brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Why do I feel so obligated to masterbate just because I’m single and it’s valentines Day...
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