No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
