I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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