There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
