She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
