office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
We left an ass print on the piano.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
