So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize