We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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