she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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