this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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