He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
