ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
