Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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