Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Randomize
