; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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