Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize