ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
