My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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