I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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