Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
