Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
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