after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize