so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
