I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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