This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
