I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
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