no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Everyone says I win the strip club
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
