please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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