Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
