is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
