Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
