Im at strip club and am horny
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Randomize
