Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
my being single is dangerous.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
