she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize
