today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Randomize
