that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
After last night, I think I need a service animal to monitor the life choices I make when I'm inebriated. A monkey, or a clever dog. Or a really assertive parrot.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
