It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize