I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
