I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
