the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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