Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
