he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
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