The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
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