She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
