that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize
