i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
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