that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
and she was petting her beer can
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
