This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Green mimosas i think yes
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
