3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
You're earring is so big in my mouth
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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