He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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