if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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